Wisconsin makes me so happy. Sure there are things that drive me crazy, but I love being there, in the country, near the water, near my family. I eat too much, my family time is completely chaotic, I spend too much money, but Im so thrilled to be there.
While I was running yesterday morning, I turned the curve and saw a little old man, standing in a ditch, trying to heave these huge logs onto his trailer. I ran to the end of the road, and when I came back I asked if he needed some help. Sure, he replied. So I helped him push the logs to the shoulder of the road, and lifted them into the trailer. He turned to me, "Guess how old I am." Oh, Im so bad at this game. How about 65? "Nope, Im 83." Well, you're doing pretty good for 83, I said, thinking to myself, if my father lives to be 83, this is exactly the stupid shit he's going to do, during a heatwave, at 9 o'clock in the morning all by himself.
We nearly filled the trailer, when two older guys appeared. "Need some help?" they asked. "You couldn't find anyone else besides your granddaughter?" I could hear the outright scorn in his voice, both insulting me (why was I trying to act unladylike) and the old man (why was he using the help of some lowly girl). I should have said, "What difference does it make that Im a female, fuckhead, when Im two extra hands to help?" Instead the old man said, "She's a stranger to me." I was just running down the road and wanted to help. We filled the trailer, and pushed all the logs out of the ditch, then the old man drove away. I turned and ran the rest of the way home, stewing.
I should be used to that bullshit--I've heard it my whole life. I was a tomboy as long as I can remember, and only started liking girly things a few years ago. I know that Wisconsin holds its gender roles dear to its heart. But it still drives me crazy. I was venting to my mom. She's was like, "Oh I get that all the time. But because people see me doing all of this stuff around here all the time, they don't bug me about it anymore. Women around here just dont help outside the house." Well, I replied, if Im one of the rare ones that do, why aren't they happy and excited, instead of scornful and patronizing? Men around here are stupid, I said. She replied, "Yup. They sure are."
It made me smile.
It was great to see my sister and her family. My grandmother came down with lots of treats, and she helped me make sour cherry jam. I baked my sister a chocolate layer cake with oreo cookie whipped cream filling. It was a total pain in the rear--I was supposed to use 10 inch pans but only had 9, I overfilled them, and my mother's stove is at a tilt, so one pan completely spit out about a third of its contents all over the oven. Good times. But it tasted really good.
Yesterday we shopped at Kohl's (I couldnt resist!) and found some good clearance. Then we headed to the airport. Due to some delay, my scheduled flight was over three hours late, but the airport gods were smiling on me. United switched me to Delta and instead of suffering a useless stopover in Chicago, they gave me a direct flight to Atlanta. Whooo hoooo!
Jeremy was a welcome sight, and we walked to the car I grunted and groaned at the heat. Despite Wisconsin's heatwave, and Chicago's record breaking 103 degrees on Sunday, it at least cools way off when the sun goes down. Not here. Still just as hot at 9 pm as it was at noon. Argh!!!
This morning, going to work was hard. It wasn't terrible, and went pretty fast--thanks to a pizza party for working so hard during the last few weeks. Just give us some food and we'll stop complaining, at least for a little while.
When I got into the car to go home, I found my rear view mirror had melted off the windshield. Nice. Jeremy hadn't left me with much gas, and when I got to the gas station on empty, I realized that I had left my wallet on the coffee table. I had no money, no credit card and no gas. I walked in and asked the guy if I could call Jeremy and he could give them HIS credit card, since I didnt even have my license to prove who I was. He said, sorry, we can't do that. When I explained that I lived in Decatur, he looked at me and asked, "What pump are you at?" Pump Two. "Just go out and pump five dollars of gas. When you get a chance, you can stop in sometime and pay me back." Can you believe that??? Who even does that anymore in this day and age? I thanked him (although I should have gushed more than I did) and had just enough gas to get home. When I stop by tomorrow, Im going to get him a treat for a thank you. I thought I was totally fucked, and he really helped me out. Hooray for the kindness of strangers!!
Don't know if I already wrote it or not, but I got a rejection from the job I really wanted in MN. I still have another application out there, but its been a few weeks and my sore attitude isn't hopeful anymore. We'll see. Im not giving up, but it's still overwhelming and frustrating.